I have a vision.  A strange but, solid one.

Usually, men are visual creatures —they get turned on by just looking at a hot woman wearing some nice black tights and some sexy heels. We are that easy. Really.

On the other hand, women are a little more sophisticated. They cannot be seriously turned on by just looking at a handsome guy walking by. The same guy has to actually show some interesting aspects such as being able to run and maintain a  nice conversation,  show some strong and vivid self-confidence and as cherry on top, some abs won’t hurt.

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Before you go into reading…

This is an email I sent to one of my best friends,  Kevin, a British guy that I met in Berlin.

The story of this email is quiet funny, because I’ve never wrote such long email in my entire life. My trip to London was so inspiring that I grabbed my fancy MacBook Air (See, I’m a modest guy. Told you…) while I was in the plane, I started writing like a crazy about my whole trip and what happened to me that day and how I survived the plane crash. Crazy stuff.

Enjoy!

Hi Kevin,

You are not going to believe this.

This is probably the longest email you will ever read in your life. I’m sitting on the plane flying to Warsaw, and I just can’t describe how inspired I feel.

By the end of this email, you will find out why.

Please fasten your belt, and get ready to rumble!

I was supposed to take a flight straight to Warsaw, from Casablanca. Bear in mind, I had booked my flight two months before. So far, everything was all right.

I arrived to the baggage check (1H30 before the boarding) with my beautiful smile, ready to flirt with that cute little girl, and then I got :

” Sorry sir. The plane is full. ” Said the cute little girl.

” What? You’re joking, right?” I replied, with my beautiful smile.

” Sorry. I’m not joking sir.”

” WTF?? I booked the flight two months ago? What happened? “

” I don’t know. You can’t get on the flight. “

I got really pissed off. I wanted to talk with the Marketing Department. Why the fuck on earth you sell tickets to people with a full flight? I wanted to know.

After deep conversation, the Marketing manager said : ” This is a strategy sir. We always sell 5 more tickets that we have places, and we hope they won’t show up. If they do, we give them
a compensation for another flight.

What the fuck??

I was shocked. Literally.

” So first arrived, first served? ” I was asking.

” Yes, sir.” The fucking manager replied, with a bitchy smile (they know what they did.)

He followed… ” Here’s what I’m gonna do. I’m gonna put you on flight to London, then to Warsaw. That’s the only solution we’ve got for you – take it or leave it.”

” When does the flight leave?” I asked.

” In 4 hours. You will arrive at 5pm in London, then you wait two hours, then you take the flight at 7pm to Warsaw.”

I had no choice. I had to accept it.

I waited. Waited. And waited.

Time to go to London

Secretly, just between us, I knew it would be bloody complicated in London to go through, in terms of VISA issues. But never mind.

I’m always optimistic, and I was going to make it it. That’s me. Always put a beautiful smile on, and you will make it.

So, I got to the aircraft, and who did I see?

A friend that I hadn’t talked to in 3 years. The short story is that he pissed me off one day, and I decided to stop talking to him and put him outside of my friend zone. Only good guys can make it and stay in my FZ. Only the hardest. Only the toughest. This is Sparta!

(I took the last line from the movie 300. I always dreamed of putting it in one of my writings. So there you go. Lovely, huh?)

Ok. So what’s going on with this friend?

My beautiful smile stayed with me, by th eway. I had to put it for him as well. It had been 3 years since we last exchanged words. But this coïncidence sounds like the song ” to good to be true ” only with the lyrics changed to :” To weird to be true “

I said hi to him and we exchanged two little worlds.

” So now you live in London?” He asked jealously. (Yes. I could see it.)
” Dude. It’s a loooooong story. Can’t make it now – people behind me waiting to pass – But I’m still in Warsaw “

” It’s alright man. Have a seat. I will take care of you. “

” Thanks man. I’m looking forward to it. “

I sat in my place, looking around to see would would sit next to me. You know, I always fly in the middle of two chicks. (The gods loves me and know about my business) But man, this time, no luck : I got two black dudes
and they were kinda hitting on me. (Ok, I exaggerate a bit. But you get the point)

I took out my brand new white iPhone, and texted my best friend to tell her about what happened.
We exchanged a couple of texts. I told her about my plans, everything is alright, she misses me and stuff (you know…) and I then I  had to switch my phone off.

My friend from the crew invited me to come over, where the guys sit when they aren’t doing that crappy part of the job : getting people more more juice, dealing with another another who wants to maybe jump etc, etc…
I went by the back of the plane, and my lost-friend started to give me some really cool stuff : Cookies, chocolates, drinks, 869 kind of cheeses, and we had a little chat about what our lives looked like over the last 3 years.
It was nice to get his news. Even though he pissed me off. That’s ok. I have a big heart. I forgave him. Words of wisdom. (I told you, I’m a good guy)

The flight was amazing. I met a lost-friend. I ate first-class food. I didn’t have to sit next to the two black guys who, by the way, smelled like fish. But that’s another story. Just leave it

We arrived in London. The weather is, wait for it, wait again… BEAUTIFUL.

I was expecting some heavy rain and a cloudy sky. But no, the sky was blue just like my beautiful eyes, and the temperature, boy, was 27°.

Lovely.

Now, let the fun begin; Or shall I say : The love story?

We will find out just after the commercials.

just kidding. No commercials here. I would love to. But next time.

So remember, Kevin. I had some doubts about the situation arriving in the UK. A guy from Morocco, with a Polish residence card, landing in London, and going to Warsaw.

What the fuck man? What’s that?

I know. I know. Just stick with me.

I was waiting in the line to register or whatever. My turn arrived, and the border guy said :

” Welcome to the UK. Can I see your passports sir.”  said the guy, brutishly. The guy was about 50 I would say. Do I have to mention how much I just love the British accent?

” He you go sir. This is my passport, and this is my ID card. ” I replied. Then I added :

” We might have a little situation here…. “

” So what are you going to do in the UK? “

” No sir. I’m going to Warsaw – Poland “

” Ok. What do you do there? “

” I’m a writer. “

” Lovely. What do you write about? “

Do I have to say ” Seduction “? I was asking my self.

” I write about Social Dynamics ” – I proudly said.

” Interesting. But… How (the hell) did you end up in Poland? “

” It’s a long story. To make it short, Warsaw is the only city that has inspired me so far.”

” Lovely. Euhm, I think we have a little situation here. ” He announced. Shaking his head.

Damn. I knew it. I whispered.

” You can’t go past this border neither with your resident card, nor your passport. “

” …. “

” But let me see. I’m sure we will find a solution. ” Putting a beautiful smile into his face.

” …. “

He then made some calls, ask his manager or whatever, and came back to me :

” Ok sir. Everything is alright. It’s just a matter of stamps. Then you are all good.”

” That’s nice. Thank you sir. “

10 minutes later…

” Ok sir. Here we go. This is your passport, and this is your card. Now you are allowed to cross the UK borders. Do you know where is you flight? Which terminal?”

” I have absolutely no idea. “

” Let me see… hmm hmmm… I can see it. It’s terminal 5. You have to take a bus, number 27, it takes 15mn, and then you’re there. If you want, this is a little draft of how you can easily get there.
I wish you a lovely and pleasant flight. “

Seriously? Am I dreaming? Dude, I come from Morocco, technically for him, I’m an Arab. He can’t understand I’m actually a Berber. His mind can’t make the connection. But why is so kind to me? Moreover, he speaks in a lovely British accent. What the fuck is going on?

I got to the bus, with my beautiful smile, this time, the smile came from my heart. I felt at peace. And. Love. I flew to so many destinations but I never met somebody who was that professional with me.
I was amazed. Positively shocked, but just happy. Can’t really put words to describe my feelings.

Respect.

Still positively in shock, I waited for my flight to Warsaw. I decided to kill time, and went to the Tax Free Shops.

And boy, even though I don’t believe in love at first sight or whatever crap it is, I saw that girl.

She was there, standing in a beautiful way, amazing body language, and yes, you guessed it right, she also had a beautiful smile, just like mine. Yup, I keep saying it.

” What can I do for you, Sir? ” She said in a gorgeous British accent.

I could see the words, beautifully coming out from her mouth, one by one. She sounded like a cute little baby. My God? Where am I? Is she talking to me?

Looked around, found out, she was talking WITH me. Because yes, I was already ” In Da Moment “

I told her I want Vogue, and asked where I can find it.

” Wait here Sir. I will get it for you. “

She turned, and walked, just like a princess, into the book/magazine store direction. For the first time in my life, I can honestly say I enjoyed watching somebody walking.

(Nice ass by the way… But let’s just keep it romantic)

” Here it is, Sir. Anything else? “

Your number please. I wish I could say.

” No that’s fine. Thank you very, very much. ” I said, while I was staring at her Barby-lips, just to see how the hell she produced these words, with such a cute lovely British Accent.

I was in love with her. I could take her out, enjoy the night listing to her, and then, propose to her. Yes, I’m serious.

Well. That dream lasted a few seconds. I was incapable of unleashing my charm and seduction. She was just… just… just, I don’t know man… she was already, a charm.

We didn’t need MY charm. I just wanted to enjoy the moment and leave her there, my heart full of emotions and strange feelings.

Ding Dang Dong. Passengers flying to Warsaw, British Airlines flight number 848 are welcomed for boarding. I could hear in the giant speakers. Yes, it’s time to go back to the reality.

Princess stays. I have to go.

I got in the plane, took my Macbook Air, and start typing these words. I was bloody inspired. I couldn’t wait. I had to get out my feelings.

What am I gonna write about? I was asking myself.

Oh yes, I will write a draft e-mail to Kevin. Kevin is THE closest British friend I have, therefore, I had to express my feelings to him  about theses few British people that made a huge, huge impression on me.

Boy. This is a hat-trick for you guys. Big respect.

Your friend,

Kamal.

So, my friend, what do you wanna know about me?

Any idea?

Alright. I got this. So I’ll start with me becoming a writer. (See how modest I am?)

So…

Back to December 2008, while I was enjoying doing an internship in a very big company in Poland ( Warsaw), the financial crisis hit the world, and, you’ve guessed it, I was fired. [Read more…]